Shit I Correct While Tutoring

I work as a tutor for a chain company in Canada, and this is some of the shit I get while correcting their work.
August 29

Shit I deal with while tutoring.

  • Girl: Alex, why are you leaving? I'd rather (insert my name here) leave than you, he sucks!
  • Girl: I wanna go to Harvard when I grow up.
  • Me *sarcastically*: Me too!
  • Girl: Only smart people can go there.
  • Girl: I heard McDonalds is hiring, though.
July 28

Can you guess which word was suposed to be blank?

  • The butterflies maple around the flowers. The maple flies high above. The stars maple in the night.
July 18
  • Q: Why is James walking?
  • A: James is walking to kill the doorway.
July 11

Kids that don't want to do their homework.

  • Q: 4 x 32 = 111
  • Q: 4 x 33 = 111
  • Q: 4 x 34 = 111
  • Q: 4 x 42 = 111
  • Q: 4 x 43 = 111
  • Q: 4 x 44 = 111
July 7
“ But the head instructor said you HAVE to tell me which of my true or false corrections are wrong. He’s your boss, you have to listen to him! Kid who thinks he’s smart enough to get the answers to true or false questions (we only put how many are wrong, not which ones)
July 6

Children learning to swear

  • Question: The mouse was (blank) for the lion's safety.
  • Answer: The mouse was fuck for the lion's safety.
+
  • Question: The river's water is (blank) and (blank).
  • Answer: The river's water is swag and OG.